SCHWING

Sep 1, 2002

Review by SCHWING, September, 2002

This is not a full review but I hope TER publishes it to help all DC area hobbyists and visitors. Ruby advertises in DC-Exotics without a photo. I'm always looking for a bargain so when she quoted $120 for FBSM, off I went. She's located in an apartment near the Metro Center Station. As I walked down the hall toward her apartment, I noticed a smell. It did seem to get stronger as I got closer to her unit but I figured someone must have spilled something. Unfortunately, when she opened the door, the stench hit me like a line drive to the balls. I stupidly entered the apartment. Being the optimist that I am, I was hoping that her room might be better or she might have the window open or something. It was a dank, dark dungeon. The place looked like it hadn't been cleaned in 20 years. I will try to describe the smell but it's really indescribable. It's a combination of moldy mildew, shit, sweat, rotten fish, rotten food, and just plain dirt. I've never done this before but I turned around and said I had to leave. I started scrambling to get out of her door (she's got like 4 locks on it). She told me there was a $20 cancellation fee. I happily paid and she let me out. God it was good to get into the fresh air. I sniffed my clothes and they seemed to have a faint smell which aired out within a few blocks. However, my left hand, which had contacted her door, REEKED. I came home and took a long shower. Guess what...my left hand still stunk. Not as bad but it was there. I put some cologne on it and it seems OK now. DO NOT GO TO THIS PROVIDER UNLESS YOU CAN'T SMELL. Even if you can't smell you are at risk of picking up an intense, disgusting, nauseating odor if you stay in her apartment longer than a few minutes. I would say I was in there for 60-70 seconds. By the way, she's about 50, short, fat. She's white and has bleached blonde hair. I think she has a Russian accent. She does have big hooters though.